#it’s just such a more…caring interpretation

[ifyouencounterwolf]

Normalize this normalize that, we as writers and ARTISTS need to normalize NOT to see any critiques/negative feedback of our WORKS as a critique of OURSELVES.

When your work is finished and posted, it is done. It marks the end of a unique creative process and is now by and large independent from you. No matter how much of a magnus opus you think of it, you will be creating something better in the near future. So how would that posted work serve you now? By getting the FEEDBACKS from your readers.

How did that make others feel? Did it do the job of disturbing people or comforting people that you have intended it to do? Do people feel something unintended from your work? Do people feel anything from your work? Those are things as authors, we needed to know about, in order to know more about ourselves, and that's not just about our current skill levels.

Believe it or not, there's no inherently bad feedback, the negative ones are not inherently different from positive ones. They are all. just. feedback. They don't define you as a person, they are not attacking you as a person. Even with the worst kind "I hate this so much hope you kys" you could either ignore or ask how they hate it and where do they hate the most. Hate supply is still supply as my narc self would say.

That is, unless you are creating something for money and engagement/attention, and getting criticized will destroy your so-called celebrity fame and break the illusion that you are a prodigy and you don't need efforts to improve like everyone else on this planet earth. But sis, that's your problem.

Writing is a way of communication and forming a discussion, conversations cannot happen if either side is not allowed to speak freely. That goes for both the bad readers who demand authors to stop writing certain topics that disturb them, and bad writers who demand special treatment from the world simply because they created something for free and they thought they have a certain moral superiority to the "free-loaders".

Yes. You did create something for free and you didn't ask for the criticism. But you did that out of love and passion didn't you? Because as human beings, we are privileged to have this creative mind and this desire to express ourselves through our artworks, we live inside our own world but sometimes we want others to take a look at it and therefore we write something or we draw something and they reflect our thoughts and experiences and imaginations.

So what do our readers owe us? ABSOLUTELY NOTHING.

No one had this moral obligation to only make compliments and really really really mild suggestions and they still have to live in fear thinking whether the authors are still going to get offended because they interpreted "Looking forward to updates" as a demand or "I thought I wouldn't like it but I did" as a jeer.

Damn, if I'm a reader I would just say FORGET IT. I like it or I don't like it, who cares about my opinion? One wrong word would get me in fandom jail.

Except we do fucking care. Do you know what a purgatory I'm living in when I wrote my heart and soul out and people are just not going to leave anything for me to know how I did?

The readers' silence and uncaring to artists is a much more cruel punishment than their hate.

We have talked so much about "don't like it don't click" as a gotcha for the readers, but how about "don't like it but still give it a chance and tell me about it even if you still don't like it"? Because I trust you as my audience, that you have sufficient levels of media literacy and you have good tastes, and you can engage with artworks responsibly... THAT'S WHY I POSTED IT.

I could have just shown my stuff to only a small friend circle and let them be the judge but I chose to put it out there. Because I wanted it to stir up something so I could engage in conversations with people who only know me through my work and I would prefer it to stay that way. If the conversation is just about my typos and my grammar be it that way. It's still better than nothing.

That being said, we should not make it a consensus that readers need to give only compliments or just shut up. We should make authors themselves decide whether they wanted to be criticized or not. Authors can absolutely set up boundaries on how their works should be engaged, authors could say that "I want feedback but please don't nitpick my grammar or typo" or "this is personal to me/I am a first time writer so please be more gentle with your feedback".

But if you don't say anything then consider your work a free game if you may. See who catches the most of your hidden details and symbolism and see who asks the most annoying questions. Damn. As a writer that would actually be my dream.

not to be controversial bc I know this is like…not in line with shifting opinions on fanfic comment culture but if there’s a glaring typo in my work I will NOT be offended by pointing it out. if ao3 fucks up the formatting…I will also not be offended by having this pointed out…

‘looking forward to the next update’ and ‘I hope you update soon!’ are different vibes than a demand, and should be read in good faith because a reader is finding their way to tell you how much they love it. I will not be mad at this.

‘I don’t usually like this ship but this fic made me feel something’ is also incredibly high praise. I’m not going to get mad at this.

even ‘I love this fic but I’m curious about why you made [x] choice’ is just another way a reader is engaging in and putting thought into your work.

I just feel like a lot of authors take any comment that’s not perfectly articulated glowing praise in the exact manner they’re hoping to receive it in bad faith.

fic engagement has been dropping across the board over the last several years, and yes it’s frustrating but it isn’t as though I can’t see how it happens. comment anxiety can be a real thing. the last thing anyone wants to do is offend an author they love, and that means sometimes people default to silence.

idk where I’m going with this I guess aside from saying unless a comment is outright attacking me I’m never going to get mad at it, and I think a lot of authors should feel the same way. ESPECIALLY TYPOS PLZ GOD POINT OUT MY TYPOS.

[ladylilithium]

Sansa’s voice makes people uncomfortable — so they call her power-hungry

On why does the fandom empathize with Jon's trauma but ignore Sansa's?

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Since The Dreadful stills shook the Jonsa beehive, we've been awake��and I've been rewatching many GOT clips since then. I started thinking about this topic while watching scenes of Jon and Sansa after he was named King in the North. To this day, I still see comments calling Sansa “arrogant” or power-hungry, saying she constantly undermines Jon by questioning him in public. And honestly? I think that’s incredibly unfair. People are so quick to interpret Sansa’s actions through Jon’s perspective—not only without considering why he sees her that way, but also without trying to understand where Sansa herself is coming from.

Let’s take a look at Jon first. He’s carried a lifelong inferiority complex from being a bastard — he’s always felt like he doesn’t truly belong or deserve anything he’s given. And then he was literally betrayed and murdered by the Night’s Watch. That’s a deep, legitimate trauma. We understand that, we empathize with him.

So when Sansa questions him, it triggers his fears of being unworthy or even betrayed again. Her opinion matters to him — probably more than anyone else's — so it stings even more when he perceives her disagreement as disapproval. But that doesn’t mean she is undermining him.

I'm going to be that person and say that we live in a patriarchal society, and fandoms reflect that. People instinctively side with male POVs, and dismiss or villainize women who step out of line, specially when these ones represent the "nagging wife/partner" trope (think about Skyler, for example), or go against the male protagonists opinions. In this case, fans rush to empathize with Jon’s insecurities, but they don’t extend the same empathy to Sansa.

Which is wild, because this girl spent FIVE WHOLE SEASONS (in-world years) being silenced, ridiculed, abused — literally held hostage, over and over again. By Cersei. By Joffrey. By the Boltons. Surrounded by spies, sadists, liars. She learned to smile and nod while she was breaking inside. She survived King's Landing, the Boltons, and countless moments where she had to stay quiet to survive. Now, for the first time, she's back home — finally in a position where her voice can be heard and respected — and people expect her to stay silent?

Yes, she questions Jon. Yes, she wants to be taken seriously. And yes, she wants credit. But is that really so wrong?

Wanting recognition doesn’t make her arrogant, nor power-hungry. Wanting to speak after years of silence isn’t an act of rebellion — it’s an act of healing. Jon interprets her disagreement through the lens of his trauma, and she speaks from hers.

And that’s what frustrates me: fans can understand Jon’s trauma, but suddenly forget what trauma looks like when it’s Sansa’s.

There’s this scene where she compares Jon to Joffrey, and he gets offended — understandably so. But when he asks if she really thinks he’s like Joffrey, she shuts it down right after, telling him he’s nothing like Joffrey. Because he isn’t. And she knows that. But her reaction came from her own pain. Her own history. She lived for years with men who silenced, mocked, used and abused her. She's the one who's been undermined for years.

Now that she’s finally free, surrounded by people who care about her, why shouldn’t she speak up?

People love to say Sansa was out of line, that she wanted power to herself (also projecting Arya's pov), that she was just trying to tear Jon down. But maybe — just maybe — she finally felt safe enough to disagree.

If anything, the fact that she does disagree with Jon publicly shows that she sees him as someone who will listen, not punish. It means she feels safe enough to say what she thinks. That’s not arrogance, that’s trust.

So no, she’s not trying to undermine Jon. She’s trying to protect him. And protect herself too. (plus, we have a whole-ass season 8 with her being Jon's PR manager: hyping him up, vouching for him, mad that he gave up the crown, pushing his claim to the iron throne. Girl was putting in work, lmao)

[idllytarott]

PAC: Your Hidden Talents. (Tarot Reading)

What are your hidden talents? What is that thing you're good at and don't know it yet? What is stopping you from uncovering it?

pick a picture or a number for your reading! think wisely.

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PILE I.

Hello first pile, your hidden talents, or one of them, is your patience. Your ability to get things done efficiently , funny enough, you choose the clock! You live time in a different way than other people do. It is your practicality, and willingness to wait for the right moment that makes you very talented, not everyone has the patience of a saint, you think strategically even when it's the most miniscule thing. You believe that hard work will always pay off, so you are willing to endure many things. Although, I see that you don't see this as a talent or a strength, rather than a weakness, you think you are too indecisive or think too much before jumping into something, that you are a coward, even. But the cards are interpreting this differently. You believe your strengths are your weakness, that your hidden talent is actually what stops you from reaching your full potential, but that's not true, you are very smart, and resilient, you're built differently than others, in the sense that you don't mind waiting for things to unfold on their given time, you observe and analyze every option before deciding on the better one, something you take too long, but you never make anyone waste their time. Your hidden talent is not only patience, as I said resilience, endurance, and a big intuition that is the main reason why you do things at the time you do them. You might or might not, believe in divine timing, but you are the type of person to follow your intuition even if you don't necessarily believe in the esoteric. It's knowing when the time is correct, when hard work pays off because a lot of inner work has been done.

How can you use this hidden talent? The cards tell me you already are, things are unfolding naturally to you, in a way it feels spontaneous or good luck, but it's also part of hard work. You're a person who thinks of money a lot, you might do well in money oriented jobs or careers, like a banker or accountant, economics or even as an entrepreneur, you'd do well in jobs where you take care of the money, receiving it and giving it to people, math is something you do well or you don't have any problem in things that are more complex. The card of The Star suggests you to look for a new job, to venture on new journeys, and not stay in one place for too long. If you've been considering leaving your job or your hometown or starting another career, this might be a good opportunity. You are strange in nature, you don't feel like you depend on others, you have patience and intelligence, charisma and are money-oriented, but, as of right now, you can lack initiative and ambition. You've been getting too comfortable in one place for too long, but now it's time to extend your wings and look for something new, you are the kind of person that stays in a place even after it's long overdue, because you're a creature of habit, but this is no longer serving you. The place you are in right now, is not going to teach you more than you know, you have already absorbed and learned everything you could, it's time to learn something new!

What awaits you in the future? You are at a crossroads right now. You are not happy in the place you're in, the situation that you are in, or just bored in general. As I said, you have been feeling down, incapable, or even like a coward, you don't like where you are but you are unwilling to change it. Your indecisiveness controls you more than you control it. My advice, you have pondered over this issue enough! You've learned and grown and dealt with everything that you possibly can in this situation, a work, a career, home, or a relationship. But now you've overgrown them, and it's time to move on, to let some things go, people and places and jobs. You have a bright future, you have to get used to new experiences, otherwise you will never learn more than you know and you will never grow, it will be difficult but it will be worth a try.

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PILE II

Hello second pile, your hidden talents, believe it or not, is your grace and optimism. With the card of the Sun, you take up space everywhere , you are a shining soul that knows what to say to appease people. You are charming, charismatic, easy to talk to, you are very generous with people, and this might have you compromising too much of your own energy to people who don't have good intentions. I see you afraid of your own light, of shining too bright, you've had people tell you in the past to be less loud, to adapt to your surroundings instead of being yourself, you are not where you want to be, and you'll find that most people around you are the one making you feel at odds with yourself. You tend to be indecisive because you don't want to hurt anybody's emotions, but you possess a strong personality that, when it doesn't feel valued or placed where it needs to be, it starts to lose its power. As I said, you're very charismatic, but you have let people dictate your way of living and feeling, even indirectly, you care too much about what others think and say about you, and you make yourself small so other people don't feel overwhelmed. But you have a talent not many people have, and that is your own personality. You fill a room easily, you're the life of the party or the one everyone wants to be, but you don't believe it. I see you have suppressed your emotions so much, that you've started to become depressed, and that has made you doubt yourself even more. You have big opportunities awaiting for you in the near future, but you are trapped in a hate-cycle, where you don't like yourself or what you do. It's not easy to say it, but this might be influenced by those closest to you, beware of who you bring to your home, invite into your place, let borrow your things or be your friend. Let go of codependency, you don't need people as much as you think so, sadness can be overcome, don't let it ruin your perception of who you are.

How can you use this hidden talent? The cards tell me that you need to go through a waking moment, a death or judgment day of some sort, you are not yet seeing things as they are. You have been sad, let down, felt alone or underappreciated, but you've felt a lot of guilt in your life. People around you made you think it was bad to want the attention or the nice things in life, you might come from a family that was more humble or did not allow themselves nice things, because they didn't think they deserved it. But you are different, your way of thinking and processing things is more distinct, you are not yet doing what you want but what is expected from you to do. But when you find the strength to move from this mindset or this group of people, life will move a lot more smoothly than you think. Things will fall into place when you allow yourself to shine and to openly love the things you love in secret, you will naturally attract people into your life that will like that you are not hiding anymore. This can go back to some sort of unconventional dream career, job, or sexuality, but your talent will shine in front of others, artistic jobs will appease you the most. Acting, drawing, writing, singing, directing, dancing. Anything that has to do with creation and self-expression is where you will find you're the most lucky.

What awaits you in the future? It's imminent that you move on from previous beliefs, that you find a light at the end of the tunnel. You will deal with a lot of repressed emotions in order to let go of this overpowering sadness you've been feeling. I see you will start following your intuition a lot more, letting it guide you in moments of indecisiveness and it will actually save you from a lot of bad decisions that you would've otherwise chosen. You will face ups and downs in regards to your emotions, because you feel things too deeply, but don't let guilt guide you back into old habits, at some point, you're going to have to be responsible for your own decisions, don't stay in a place where you don't feel loved or wanted or happy. Your intuition is right, you are meant for a lot more in life than what you have right now, but you have to want it for yourself too. When you leave, you won't be sad or resentful, you will remember everything with love and nostalgia, but you will learn to move on from things that stop you from getting the attention you deserve.

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PILE III.

Hello third pile, your hidden talent is your ability to adapt, to transform into what you need in order to survive. You have a good eye for seeing what other people want from you or what they need in specific situations, you have a very strong intuition and that makes you aware of your surroundings. But it also makes you very sensitive, prone to indigestible problems and high anxiety, you absorb too well what goes on around you to the point where you don't know where you end and where the other person starts. You can become obsessed with money or obsessed with substances, I see you like to live in fantasy or you like to sleep a lot. Your dreams are prophetic and you believe in everything that has to do with the esoteric, but you are also a hardworking and logical person. You can tell when somebody is lying to you, and I also see that you already know what this reading is going to tell you, you are the kind of person that can like or dislike someone because of their vibes, and most of the time you're right. You are always trying to run away from things when you get comfortable, you'd like to live in another country. You find it difficult to be in reality sometimes, like you wished you were in your made-up world, but as I said, you have the talent to blend in and to make anyone feel comfortable around you, you will know the right things to say and who to tell them to, you believe success is not so much about money but about the self. You deal with never knowing what you like or don't like, because you're always adapting to other people, and you have a hard time seeing things from your point of view and not someone else's. Your ability to connect with people easily can be dangerous if you don't learn to put boundaries, you will know many secrets of many people and you have to learn how to use them to your benefit when it's needed, your sensitivity or want to be in a fantasy world can make it hard for you to think you're an individual person, and not an extension of the world.

How can you use this hidden talent? You must learn to take advantage of your surroundings, of your ability to blend in, instead of focusing so much on how people perceive you or how others feel. You have strong desires for traveling away or moving from the place you are at right now. The cards are telling me that you have to be smart and take care of your own energy, because there aren't always good people and they want to take advantage of how you make them feel. Putting boundaries will be very important for you, especially if you want to change your life and do something you've never done before, somebody else can be stopping you from reaching your full potential. Or your need to be there for everyone. Be more adventurous, be okay with being alone and doing things on your own, don't just befriend anyone, learn to keep your own secrets too, don't give out personal information in the name of connection, you will end up in bad situations. You have a very strong intuition as I said before, but you tend to ignore it, practice with it more, learn to work alongside it. You'll do well in magical or spiritual related jobs, learning spells, tarot, astrology, any form of divination or spiritual journey to uplift yourself and your intuition, beware of people and of not falling victim to somebody that wants to manipulate you into joining a cult! At times, you can be your own worst enemy and go back to toxic patterns like relationships or substances or victimization, but if you really want what to move on you're going to have to work on your psychological state as well.

What awaits you in the future? If you do what's best for you, you will find yourself moving away from difficult situations, it's important that you take the initiative, because the wheel will turn in your favor, but you have to learn to receive good things and believe that you are worth receiving them. You will be able to meet and connect with important people that will be crucial to your development as a person. You will learn valuable lessons regarding love and friendship and recognizing when something or someone is not meant for you. It's important that you start being more independent, more selfish and more self-aware when it comes to you, not others. A person might want to come and steal your energy, somebody who you love! That's why it will be important to recognize certain patterns and to know when you're being manipulated or not treated fairly. Your close circle will become even smaller but don't see this as a bad thing, rather something good and eye-opening for you. You will face lessons, good and bad, and you will be open to them, I see that you will mature very quickly from these experiences and you'll learn to trust yourself the most, your intuition doesn't lie to you and it's not an anxious feeling. You'll be very happy having a little less, but you'll be at peace.

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PILE IV.

Hello fourth pile, your hidden talent might be detachment. I see you are a very inquisitive person, very independent and eloquent, you have a way with words and speaking with truth. You come with a lot of baggage, you're someone who has had to grow up too soon, dealt with some sort of death, literal or metaphorical. You have faced very abrupt changes in your life that have shaped the way you are nowadays, and it has developed into this talent that you have. You're a person that's always ten steps ahead, naturally awkward, because, as I said, you've gone through too much too young and a lot of people that are your age don't know what that is like, but you do, and you sometimes get tired of socializing, of dealing with people, but conversing, talking, writing, detaching from the situation and seeing it in retrospective is something you do well and you do it to survive as well. People around you will put you on a pedestal or give you too much responsibility, you are a trustworthy person that knows what to say and knows when to say it. You are open to hurt and to learn lessons, you find comfort in instability and leaving when your soul calls you to. There are a lot of things in your life that leave unexpectedly but you choose to see them as a lesson to learn and grow from, your way of speaking and communicating your ideas and thoughts are what makes people so drawn to you, how you think, you use strong emotions to your benefit when you can't do anything more, basically you know how to take advantage of a bad thing. I don't see you as a person obsessed with money or acclaim, but you can become self-absorbed and believe your way of living is the only right one. You have a mind like a diamond, you trust your logical thinking more than your intuition, and that might not be totally bad, but it can make you cynical and annoyed with everyday things. You are a very intense person, and you channel that through communication, through words, you let things happen, talk about them, and move on.

How can you use this hidden talent? The cards tell me that you are not yet where you need to be, mentally or emotionally to use your talent. You are a person that lives daydreaming about leaving everything behind and going crazy, doing something unpredictable, but you fear that you will disappoint people, as I said, you are put on sort of a pedestal or certain obligations are put on you that are expected to follow. You fear what people will think of others, you feel a lot of guilt for thoughts you can't control. That's why you are not quite there yet, you need to move more lightly, don't take everything so seriously, especially yourself, you have a perception of yourself that, it isn't wrong or bad, but it's filled with negativity, you see yourself in a very bad light and you punish yourself for wanting to leave and do your own things. You want to explore the world in a place where tradition is important, your views and your close circle's views are not the same, and you feel tangled in what you believe within you and what other people believe for you. But your way of seeing the world is very unique and it's a breath of fresh air, your way of seeing things for what they are rather than what you believe them to be, is unique. Anything that can make your thoughts not just be thoughts, will be useful for you, writing, talking, recording yourself or journaling can be good for you, I also see that the future holds a lot more than what you're seeing right now, the world is vast and unpredictable too.

What awaits you in the future? You'll have to follow your intuition more, not everything can be put under a logical lens, you will feel very trapped or like you're not evolving as a person and that makes you feel sick. But life happens whether you like it or not, you will face more lessons that will put you in a place where you'll have to stop ignoring your calling and do what your intuition tells you. You will be met with a lot of criticism from loved ones at first, but you will move on from that, don't be afraid of judgement from close people to you, because you are going to be very successful once you put your big girl pants and decide to do something for you and not for other people around you. A lot of abundance will follow you, as I said, your way of thinking will be a breath of fresh air and you will have a lot of people following you around, you decide what to do with that energy. Don't let your energy get stuck and unexpressed, if you have been feeling sad or depressed or like life has no meaning, it is because you're not doing what you're supposed to do, and you're rejecting what your body and soul want, the future looks promising! Don't be ashamed of your own ideas, of what you want to express, because there will be a lot of people feeling the way you feel right now, and you will know how to use this talent well.

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Song for you:

That's all guys, I hope you liked this reading! Please leave feedback!!! If you liked this reading check my Catalog of paid readings for a personalized reading.

[manytoonepoet]

Whenever I listen to a song, a few lines tend to stand out to me, and Hala CG's "Gambler" was no exception, with those lines being: "But they don't see the hand clutching on for dear life. They don't see the man as he tries, and he tries to stand tall." — with those lines being a brief yet concise summarization of how we view characters and the people around us.

Example, number one example, is the man of the song himself, Aventurine. I've already talked about this in detail in this post of mine, which I made a while back, and I highly recommend checking it out if you wish to know more, but I'll summarize it here: The way the majority of people view Aventurine is simply disgusting; they only ever care about who he is gay for or what is in his pants, and while shipping and having your own interpretations about a character is absolutely alright, oversimplifying and forcing one's headcannons compromises the true essence of the character — you might as well create a new character of your own with how many changes you've made to this one as you claim that they are this or that, and more often that not, these unnecessary and unwanted changes disrespect the original intent of the source material. A lot of these people forget, or simply choose to ignore, what Aventurine has gone through and mold him to their headcannons and push those headcannons down people's throats because they despise the fact that not everyone sees Aventurine as a submissive, masochistic, gae man for Dr. Ratio and instead enjoy and learn about a character instead of focusing on who's gae for whom and who's not. They despise the fact that people see and admire Aventurine for his resilience, his perseverance, his bravery, his intelligence, his thought process, and his strategy — they acknowledge and admire all that and more, and it is such a shame that too many people don't.

But Miss Poet, I hear you say, if you've already talked about this, then why bring it back again? Can't you just let it go? It's done! Well, Rat Urine is back just in a different outfit → Phaidei.

Again, I will restate it just in case you missed it: Shipping, having headcannons, and having your own interpretations about a character is absolutely alright so long as it doesn't compromise the true essence of a character.

But me, personally, I dislike the notion of shipping in HSR mainly because I believe romance could potentially kill or somewhat lessen the impact of their main story theme of trailblazing. This group of people is made up of the lost, the broken, and the hurt, yet even as they wander amongst the stars, they're never alone because they have the people that they have formed bonds with along the way, and more people to encounter in the future. HSR's journey is that—a journey, one that is symbolic of real life, funnily enough. Because in real life, we love (or at least are supposed to). We love and we uphold hope and we create relationships with that love and hope, relationships that aren't inherently romantic. In fact, I'm quite proud of Hoyo for giving Mydei and Phainon such a deep and emotional bond because what I personally see in media usually involves strong female friendships rather than male ones, and I believe we need more of this kind of friendship and brotherhood as well.

And I believe THAT is what's heartwarming about Amphoreus' story — this group of people is brought together by loss and pain and war and death, and all of that made them appreciate the bond and camaraderie present within their little group. They understand that they will reach their doom soon, sooner than they might think, even. But even then, they still took the time to bond and grow closer to each other instead of shutting everyone out because, at the end of the day, they only have each other, don't they? They only have each other to rely on, and they're the only hope Amphoreus has left. If they crumble and fall apart, what will be of Amphoreus? They are the soldiers sent to the frontlines to protect the innocent and secure even the slightest bit of hope that there will be a future for everyone else, even if they won't be there to see it. In fact, speaking of soldiers, they often form exceptionally close bonds due to the unique and intense circumstances they share. The combination of high-stakes missions, reliance on one another for survival, and extended time together in challenging environments fosters deep trust and camaraderie. Shared experiences—like training, combat, or long deployments—create a sense of brotherhood or sisterhood that can surpass typical friendships. However, the strength of these bonds varies based on individual personalities, unit dynamics, and the intensity of shared experiences. Some soldiers may not form close friendships due to personal differences or shorter service periods, but for many, these relationships become profound and enduring.

Take this post however you want to, call me names, slurs, throw insults my way, but I simply wish to provide another perspective and to bring something new to the table because when I see Mydei and Phainon together, I don't wonder about who is top or who is bottom, I don't wonder about what positions they prefer or what places they enjoy doing it. Because when I see Phainon and Mydei, I see the bond eloquently described by the lovely people in the pictures on top, I see the bond I wish to grow and nurture with my own best friend too.

And no, I'm not criticizing anyone for liking this ship, I'm not acting nor do I see myself as someone above the rest of you, but I simply wish the fandom wasn't so quick to label them as gay or have their entire character be oversimplified as someone's gae submissive malewife or someone's dominant daddy... HSR has such an emotional and nuanced storytelling, one that talks about these kinds of relationships so well, and I just wish the fandom could appreciate it as it is, rather than twist it into something that it is not.

Because, yes, a lot of people here don't see the hand clutching on for dear life. They don't see the man as he tries, and he tries to stand tall.

[astrosamara]

Jupiter Transits Through the Houses

Jupiter expands and blesses the house it transits through. Be cautious of overindulgence in these areas though, since too much of a good thing can have negative consequences as well. As always, these observations are very general and for greater accuracy in interpretation, the full birth chart must be involved.

🩷Jupiter transiting the 1st house: Life just seems to flow smoothly and work out for you with little hassle. You might feel as if the universe is truly on your side during this time with blessings appearing as if from nowhere. People notice an aura of positivity and abundance surrounding you. You might even appear glowing physically. There's a strong drive and desire to live large and abundantly. You might experience many moments of feeling vibrationally high. I interpret this time as one where you fully blossom and grow into your individuality.

🩷Jupiter transiting the 2nd house: The most obvious interpretation of this transit is receiving a lot of luck with money. You can earn a lot more money as well as making more money than you ever have before. This can also be a time where you develop a stronger sense of self-worth and security. You can feel very comfortable in life. Also, with an increase in money can also come an increase in spending. Be careful not too spend too recklessly during this transit, especially on material comforts.

🩷Jupiter transiting the 3rd house: If you have siblings, this can be a time where you notice your siblings receiving a lot of blessings. This is also a great time to embrace learning new skills and trying new things. Speaking, writing, and communication specifically will be great skills to expand on and you can receive a lot of opportunities in these areas. You can feel especially positive while going on short trips and spending time in your community. A stronger desire to socialize and connect with people.

🩷Jupiter transiting the 4th house: Moving, expanding, and positivity within your home and family life is all prevalent here. A stronger desire to go inward and spend more time at home as well. You could receive blessings and opportunities from your family. You might just feel a stronger desire to renovate or redecorate your home. I've noticed that this is a time where perhaps your external world quiets down a bit, and a lot of your positivity comes from your inner world. You can discover a lot about yourself and what provides you true comfort and peace.

🩷Jupiter transiting the 5th house: This is a fantastic time for romance, love, and dating. Time and time again I've noticed so many people in my life benefit positively in their love life during this transit. A huge boost in creativity as well. There's a lot of joy and happiness during this period overall. You feel a boost in confidence and ability to take on new and exciting opportunities. There's also an emphasis on children during this transit. Perhaps you can have children or children can play a significant and positive role in your life. If you're interested in trying new hobbies, this is a great time to do it.

🩷Jupiter transiting the 6th house: Daily life and health become abundant in this period. You can have positive daily habits and a routine that is beneficial for your overall health and wellbeing. You can also start a new job that you enjoy. Perhaps you get along nicely with your coworkers, the pay is great, the working conditions are positive, etc. There's a strong possibility that you just feel less daily stress than usual during this time. Getting a new pet is also likely.

🩷Jupiter transiting the 7th house: Similar to the 5th house transit, this is a great time for love and romance, although this house is more symbolic of committed love and long term partnerships. This is a very common marriage transit. This is also a great time to start a new business venture or partnership if it's something you're interested in, as it's likely to be received well during this time. Other people become significant in some way. Life in general felt very busy, active, and social in my experience. Meeting new and important people in my life as well. 🩷Jupiter transiting the 8th house: A very transformative period. There's an increase in desire for deep growth and personal development. This is a transit where you end it as a brand new person. I have an 8th house stellium, so it's likely this transit affected me greater for this reason. If you're someone who shies away from the darker aspects of life or your shadow self, this is likely to be a rough period for you. Although, it's a blessing in disguise when you realize how important it was to allow yourself to go deep and shed away all that was holding you back from stepping into a better and more powerful version of yourself. It's also common to experience an increase in sexuality during this time. 🩷Jupiter transiting the 9th house: A very busy, busy time. I was moving and traveling constantly the year I experienced this transit. I also started university and began my interest in spirituality. I met many different unique people and expanded my knowledge in many subjects. You may notice yourself tackling life's obstacles with optimism and an open mind. Wherever you travel during this period can be a very spiritual and optimistic experience for you. I visited a new city during this time that I fell in love with and developed a strong connection to. Pursuing a more spiritual life is very common.

🩷Jupiter transiting the 10th house: This was an interesting transit for me. I began a job that I absolutely hated before eventually leaving soon after, just for a better opportunity to be waiting for me around the corner. I moved into my first apartment and life became more peaceful and aligned with what I wanted and needed. It made me realize that Jupiter can often bless these different areas of your life by first removing what isn't meant for you and allowing new and greater opportunities to enter your life afterwards. This was a time I really craved and valued freedom and abundance in my career and life overall. 🩷Jupiter transiting the 11th house: Similar to the 10th house transit, I left a lot of toxic people in my life, including a long-term friendship that hadn't been working out for years. I also abandoned previous dreams and developed new ones that felt more fitting to me. My dreams and desires were very strong during this time. This was more of a quiet period in my life where I was really building a vision for what I wanted my life to look and feel like. I experienced a lot of positivity through online communities and groups, specifically when it came to astrology and spirituality. Meeting new people, joining new social groups, and focusing on long-term goals are all likely to occur during this transit. 🩷Jupiter transiting the 12th house: Such an incredible and unique time. My dreams became very rich, vivid, and intuitive. I was quite isolated during this time, but the isolation was something I needed. My inner world became very abundant and dreamlike. Life just felt like a dream this entire time. Pay attention to your intuition and your subconscious strongly during this time, because it can reveal a lot. I began therapy as well and began to notice very positive changes in my life the more I took care of my mental health. I spent a lot of time working on myself and clearing out mental garbage, which I noticed benefiting me positively by the time my 1st house Jupiter transit started.

[akechi-stole-my-heart]

whether akechi likes sweets is something hotly debated, with people coming down strongly on both sides. if you look at what he actually says, i can understand why you would come to either conclusion. but i think we can pretty definitely say that based on canon, akechi doesn't dislike sweets--and probably likes them more than he claims.

as far as i can tell, fanon akechi having a sweet tooth comes from his "delicious pancakes" comment along with the detective prince's shtick about having a sweet tooth. but then royal came out and seemingly contradicted this interpretation with akechi's rank 3 and his scene with kasumi at the café he frequents, when he says his sweet tooth is just a marketing strategy. but let's look at what he actually says.

first, he says that he has no strong opinions either way on sweets. he says he doesn't hate them, but he doesn't love them either. he seems mostly indifferent. put a pin in that, i'm gonna come back to it later.

but here comes the really interesting thing that i think a lot of people--especially those who think akechi dislikes sweets--overlook. you and akechi order a sweet dish, you ask about his sweet tooth, and he says he doesn't really have an opinion on sweets either way. then you eat the dish, and he says he was pleasantly surprised and deeply enjoyed it after all.

this doesn't mean akechi loves sweets, but it definitely contradicts the idea that he hates them. he at least can enjoy them sometimes. maybe his surprise indicates that he expected to hate it, but since he just said he has no strong feelings either way, i think he expected to be indifferent. but surprisingly, he liked it after all. remember that pin? keep remembering it. this is also gonna come back later.

finally, we have the infamous scene with akechi and kasumi at the café.

but notice, he never says "i actually hate sweets." he just says that his strong sweet tooth is a marketing strategy, he never gets into his own opinions on it outside that. i think this is further evidence that he just has no strong feelings either way.

also, notice that he is the one to have chosen this café for them to go to. if he really hated sweets, would he repeatedly take you to a café that serves sweets of his own accord? it's not like he's being forced to take you here for PR, these are personal outings. he seems to genuinely like this café outside the marketing.

so: what did we get from these two scenes? first, akechi claims to not have any strong opinions on sweets, but then genuinely enjoys a sweet dish anyway. then, he says that his sweet tooth is something they play up as a marketing strategy. so, what does this all mean?

let's return to that pin from earlier. i think akechi does actually like sweets, the problem is, he's gotten so caught up in the mask of the detective prince, he's forgotten what he actually likes and dislikes. his performance of liking sweets is just that--a performance. but once he's stripped that performance away and admitted the truth of indifference, he finds another surprising truth hidden beneath that--he does enjoy sweets, after all.

in my opinion, this is all reflective of a central truth to akechi that i've gotten into before in other metas: he doesn't know who he really is. he's so caught up in his dual masks, each so contradictory and so extreme, with their chaotic mix of lies and truths that are so difficult to parse, that he no longer knows what is genuine and what's invented. he doesn't know if he likes sweets or not--and he doesn't care. what does it matter, in the end? he likes sweets because that's what the detective prince likes for his mask and that's all that matters. what his actual opinions are are ultimately irrelevant to his goals, so he doesn't stop to think about it and come to his own conclusions.

akechi lives for the sake of his end goals, and gets lost in the masks until their lies might as well be true to him. he doesn't care what he really thinks, because he isn't really his own person anymore. he only exists to enact shido's will, and his own thoughts and feelings get further lost and forgotten to shido's puppet strings.

so, does akechi like sweets? in my opinion, yes. not as much as the detective prince does, but he likes them. he probably has his own specific preferences and tastes for different kinds of sweets just like anyone else. but he doesn't know what those preferences are, because the detective prince likes all sweets. and so when he dislikes one sweet thing but has to perform love for it anyway, a resentment against sweets starts to build up. he doesn't care about sweets, it's just a mask. he doesn't care about any of this. he hates sweets, he loves sweets, he doesn't have any strong opinions at all because none of this even matters anyway.

goro has an old memory, of his mother making him pancakes for breakfast. before she stopped making them food altogether. goro loved those pancakes. he loved sweets, and most of all, he loved it when his mother made him a meal, putting her love for her son into those delicious pancakes. but that's an old memory. goro doesn't like thinking about his mother. he'd rather forget that time, when he still had hope.

every time the detective prince performs love for his sweets, a part of him can't help but remember anyway.

[izumiphoenix]

I apologize if this is an old post and not relevant anymore, but I happened to stumble upon it and wanted to respectfully share my opinion.

I’m approaching this purely from the game’s point of view, since, after all, that’s how Astarion’s story is told. I haven’t really seen interviews or developer commentary yet, and while I think they’re a great addition, I believe it’s also valid to form an opinion based only on what the game itself shows.

In BG3, we don’t know for certain what kind of person Astarion was before. Even he doesn’t fully remember that himself.

From what I understand, there are two main interpretations: one - that he was a corrupt magistrate who abused power and paid the price; the other one - that he was someone who genuinely cared about justice and crossed the path of a powerful figure.

Personally, I think it could be both or something in between. Astarion is one of the most complex and well-written characters I’ve seen, and trying to fit him into a black-and-white scale feels too narrow for his story.

I imagine he was young, still figuring out who he was, watching the world around him and trying to find his place. He wasn't perfect, he made mistakes. Maybe he was careless, maybe selfish at times, but I don’t think he was cruel, not intentionally. He probably didn’t consider the consequences of his choices and decisions well. And he probably believed he had a whole life ahead. Not a saint, not evil - just human.

When we meet Astarion, he has a lot of learned cruelty within him and a desperate determination to survive by any means. But he also has this softness, warmth and hope inside, too. He is intelligent, perceptive, and understanding. And he genuinely looks for connection. If Astarion chooses not to ascend, that part of him starts to really shine. And I don’t believe that came from nowhere. I believe it survived, all that time, just like him.

That’s why I don’t believe Cazador’s abuse taught Astarion morality - quite the opposite, actually. It taught him fear, cynicism, and the idea that power is all that matters. He said it himself: that he prayed to all gods he could remember, begging them to save him. And no hero ever came to his rescue. In one of the early dialogues, he plainly stated that it’s foolish to believe in good and bad - there is only what is good or bad for him. And power gives you the right to do whatever you want. This is what he was made to believe under centuries of Cazador’s “teaching”.

And the PC isn’t some moral savior either. They don’t fix him. What they offer him a safe space. A space to be seen, to breathe, to choose who he wants to be. And Astarion chooses to be better. Not for anyone else, but for himself. He chooses kindness, redemption and love over power and fear.

The idea from the follow-up post, that Tav should someday dig up old court records to confront him and “humble” him into reflection... honestly, that isn't helpful. Bringing up Astarion’s possible misdeeds - things he can't even fully remember from a life long gone - feels more like punishment, coming from a Tav who sees themselves as his moral superior. He has already been dehumanized and tortured for centuries, and after all that, he still chooses to break the cycle, to seek connection, to love and be kind. Digging up a past he can’t change, after he’s already made that choice, just sends the message that he will never be good enough. That he will always need to be “put in his place.” That’s not healing, that’s control. And I believe Astarion deserves more than that. He deserves a partner who doesn’t try to keep him on the right path, but simply walks with him. Because he isn't something broken to be fixed - he deserves respect, trust and space to continue becoming who he chooses to be, without someone constantly holding his past over his head as a reminder of who they think he really is.

To be honest, I think it's good that the creators didn't tell us in the game what kind of person Astarion was before Cazador, because his story is not about who he was, but who he wants to be. But I don't think we should dismiss him either. We may not fully know the man buried in that grave, but he is still part of who Astarion is now. Just like Ascended Astarion is still him, too - twisted, afraid, desperately clinging to control. This is painful to see, but it’s another possible path, and it deserves to be acknowledged.

Astarion is layered, messy and beautiful in his contradictions. He shines through his scars. He isn’t good or bad, he’s human. And I believe we love him because of who he is, not in spite of it.

There is a level of deep, bitterly poetic and cruel irony in Astarion's death and his eventual fate as a vampire spawn. Laughable, even. Lamentable.

Where do I even begin. I once posted here my thoughts on who Astarion was before Cazador took him; and all my thoughts were based on what we can assume to be canon from scraps on information in - game and interviews with Neil. That Astarion Ancunin who was laid into the ground at Baldur's Gate cementary was a corrupt magistrate, a shining example of power abuse, indulgence, hedony, existence in privilege without any service to the world around.

We also know for a fact that Astarion is not a good person in a moral sense. Again, Neil Newbon himself talked about it. He has capability to grow, mature, open himself up, soak in the positive influence and feel for others, but he never will be the default upstanding type. That is simply not at his core.

This is why (I am aware we're talking a fictional character, headcanon is free to all in whichever way they think it suits and pleases them) I cannot for the world believe in all the fanfiction based on the notion of the tragic, tortured soul unjustly attacked and turned into a vampire, because to me - it misses the entire depth and essence of Astarion's personality and arc. He was not a "worthy" persona before Cazador; in fact, the beating he got from the Gur was well - deserved and the near - death experience... Probably so as well. Maybe if anything, this would open his eyes and force him to reflect at least a bit on his choices in the position he was occupying. (But given that he mentions begging Cazador to turn him to be able to take revenge, I highly doubt that.) So yeah... The man got what was coming to him. He deserved it.

But what he got in the end once Cazador allowed him to drink his blood and had him in his hold? Two hundred years of misery and abuse beyond description, being completely stripped of any identity and personhood? No one deserves that. Such fate should not be thrust upon anyone. Ever.

It is the cruellest, most wicked twist of fate that it took that kind of ordeal to change a corrupt little elf's view of the world and force him to even acknowledge the existence of evil deeds and abuse of power - something I am quite sure he never gave any thought to before. It took being transformed into an utterly helpless victim to make him truly see that there is good and bad and perpetuating the bad leads to pain and misery for the innocents (and you can never be sure if not for you as well), and only then, at his most pathetic, most vulnerable, after centuries of torment, it took meeting, trusting, admiring, being grateful to, befriending / loving and being influenced by a genuinely good and kind person (probably the exact opposite of who he was before) to shake and cause some shift in his inner moral compass, or rather the way he was choosing to use it. The full circle, a poignant, unwilling journey from the one abusing power, to the enslaved puppet of someone with considerably more power abusing it in the most inhuman ways possible, and this time to his own woe, to the one person able to break the abusive cycle given the right influence.

Isn't that simply poetic in the most sickly sense? A tragicomedy, if you will.

Forget about Astarion Ancunin. The grave was good for lovemaking and sharing an important moment, but whoever was laid there was not anyone worthy of your time (just like "Ascended Astarion" )The one who stands by your side now is. Your Astarion. The new Astarion, the same "lovable rogue" with a taste for theatrics, drama, debauchery, beauty, murder mayhem and loose morality, but - a better person all the same.

[follow up post here

https://www.tumblr.com/glitteryinknotes/733162725841289216/a-little-follow-up-to-my-previous-post?source=share]

[heroesrest64]

Remedy for Invisibility

(This is inspired by Moomin (1990)’s An Invisible Friend. The concept of turning invisible due to neglect and a lack of care from those around you has always hit close to home for me. I also wanted to try my hand and the more whimsical, more descriptive tone Moomin stories tend to have. This could be just about any Link, I believe, so I’ll leave it up to your interpretation.)

~~

When Link was younger, after his parents had passed and their memory faded, Link began to feel invisible.

He had nobody, and had no purpose. He disappeared the same day that his parents did, and nobody was the wiser to where he went.

Life is hard when you are an invisible child. Nobody makes you food or helps you dress, everyone is so busy with their own work so why would they pay any attention to a thing without a form?

Link had thought he would spend the rest of his life in that state.

He very nearly did, until he met another invisible child.

You were adjusted to a life of invisibility, more so that Link ever thought he would be. You were quiet. No, it was more like you had lost your voice right along with your form, and for the first time Link realized he didn’t know where his voice had gone, either.

Soon, though, he realized he didn’t need the same sounds that visible people could make. You tied a bell around where his wrist might have been, then took his hand and kept walking. Each step he took, the bell would clink and rattle in tandem with yours, a constant reminder that you were there and that he was with you.

He didn’t need to tell you when he grew hungry, or when he needed rest. You seemed to know, and you would procure fruits and veggies from the world around you, then settle on the ground while the two of you ate.

Link began to forget that he was invisible, and in fact there were times where he would catch sight of your hair bouncing with each of your steps, or the tinkling of your bells would translate as laughter in his mind, and for those short instants, he would forget that you were invisible as well.

It seemed the more he forgot, the more tangible he became. Your hands were nearly always connected now, small fingers intertwined as you walked side by side. One day you remarked about his golden hair, and neither of you spared a second thought at the sound of your voice.

It was in this way that someone who he thought was just as invisible as him became someone real and tangible and loud and wonderful. It was in a similar but wholly different way that he became someone real and distinct and bright and beautiful.

The two of you didn’t care if no one else could see you. You could see eachother, could hear eachother. It was all either of you needed.

[yuniccafton]

One more req, draw Elliot forsaken... but canon

That's a weird way to say "draw your interpretation of Elliot" but I will oblige 😍😍

I regularly see people interpret Elliot as this guy who's snappy and tired of everything which, isn't wrong, but don't forget that this guy has been working fast food service for possibly years 💀 he definitely has experience dealing with all sorts of customers and has to thug through it. Regular death matches are probably not the worst thing he had to deal with (at least those are only maybe 5 minutes a round)

More hcs below 😍 vvv

- He's a nepo baby (the Builder family is rich and famous), but is adamant on living independently seperate from his family's fortune, hence why he works at a pizza place

- Mr. Builder isn't really abusive, moreso neglectful. Also Elliot didn't really want to take over the Dump business, hence why he seperated

- Before being forsakened, he really wants to win custody over Mia and was saving up his tips to take it to court. He wants to give her a normal life away from expectations

- He's genuinely nice and does look out for people (why he doesn't eat his own pizzas in Forsaken) but is perpetually tired. It's rare to see him snap at people unless it's n7 because he's so used to being exhausted and dealing with extra, but when he does, y'know you fucked up

- He regularly has smoke breaks

- Also he's demiboy 😍 and pan heh

- He doesn't hate c00lkidd, just his dad. He believes n7 is raising his kid horribly and shouldn't even be a father given his track record. This is amplified whenever CK ruins the restaurant, which he fully blames n7's parenting for it, never CK

- Actually does enjoy taking care of CK. He's a sweet kid, even if a little bit chaotic. Still would prefer if n7 DOESN'T leave CK with him during work hours

- Whenever CK (or back then, n7) does ruin the restaurant, he has to take extra hours to fix it, without pay

- He knows most of the survivors due to being the only one delivering pizza, and everyone was immediately familiar with him upon arrival

- Slightly uncomfortable around Builderman because his image is what his dad used to impersonate a lot, but is still courteous

- He's the one in charge of cooking for the survivors in Forsaken. The others help occasionally (namely Guest, Builderman, Noob, sometimes Shedletsky but just chicken) but he's the one manning the kitchen most of the time. Having multiple jobs while working at a pizza place does that to you

- His pizza bag generates pizza for him (thanks to the Spectre), hence why there's a cooldown. He can't bring extra slices in rounds to make healing easier

- Funnily enough, 007e7 isn’t banned from the restaurant unlike his cousin. Elliot knew most of his orders went to n7 so he’d always make CK’s favorite (a meat lovers with ”team c00lkidd“ on it) and hand it to him

- In forsaken, Elliot doesn’t hate n7 as much anymore. Maybe a heavily dislike, sure, but he can see the man has clearly change. If anything he pities the man since his kid is now a killer and doesn’t even realize. Elliot still has that soft spot deep in him for CK, as at the end of the day, it’s not the kid’s fault

[autistichalsin]

Those of us who were raised near Evangelicals (like me who grew up in a largely Evangelical/Fundamentalist community) or in the cult themselves (many of my friends growing up) have been trying to warn you all for YEARS not to underestimate them, and our warnings went ignored because "no one is that evil" or "they're just stricter Christians, they wouldn't actually do that."

The exact same reasoning used when we tried to warn you 20 years ago how evil Republicans were, which isn't a coincidence because they are the same people.

So let me break it down for you, and if any of this sounds too harsh, feel free to talk to literally any exvangelical, who will back this up.

Yes, they are cartoonishly evil. I know, I'm going to get hate for saying this. But if you ignore this point, none of the other points will make any sense. This is the framework you have to use. This is cartoon villain levels of evil.

Evangelical Christianity is, first and foremost, a death cult. They want your deaths, they want their own deaths. Birthdays are a celebration of being one year closer to going home to Jesus- no more and no less. They crave death like a suicidal person, but they would never actually commit suicide because it's "a sin," so instead they long for a rapture where they die and go to heaven while the rest of us go to hell. That is their ideal world- no world at all.

You have to understand that the root of evangelism is nihilism. NOTHING in this life matters at all, except for accepting their interpretation of God and Jesus so you can enter heaven. Your work, your relationships, your family, only matter if they are in service of God and Jesus, and not at all on their own merit. God/Jesus are the only thing that objectively matters. Which leads to...

Other humans only matter if they worship your same iteration of God and Jesus. Other Christians are liars at best and will go to hell. If your entire family dies, it's just God's will, no need to be sad- it's actually a beautiful thing because they're with Jesus now. It's why you will never persuade them to support abortion even in cases where the mother's life is at risk. If she's a good Christian, she'll know there is nothing more beautiful than to die while birthing another soldier of God, and if she's not a Christian, she deserves to die and go to hell as punishment for rejecting scripture. It's why you'll never persuade them that school shootings are worse than being queer. School shootings just send Their Own to heaven, and the nonbelievers to hell, but being gay sends everyone to hell, even themselves for tolerating it. If you don't believe in their God, the best thing you can ever be to them is a potential convert, and the worst is a test sent by God himself that they CAN'T fail lest you go to hell. Leading to...

Tolerance is cruelty to them. If you tolerate "aberrant" lifestyles, you are dooming them to hell, and yourself too. That's why they claim it's oppression to be told to tolerate others. They think only oppressing the "lesser" people will motivate them to become Good Little Christians, and avoid hell. And they think they themselves will go to hell if they are too tolerant to those outside the group.

They are pro-Zionist not because they support Jewish people in any way, but because they think it'll bring about the End Times. They want Israel to exist because they think it leads to the End Times where Jews will either convert or die. They support Zionism because they hate the nonconvertable Jews and want to convert the ones who will- that simple. Palestinian Christians are, to them, just cannon fodder sacrificed in the name of bringing about the End Times. (And of course, other peoples' Zionism isn't even the same as supporting Jewish people either, but it's especially duplicitous here).

Don't take this to mean they care about their own all that much. They see them as closer to human, but still ultimately just a soldier for God. Their deaths aren't a tragedy but a reward/celebration. They will subjugate the women in their congregations with glee, they will hatecrime queer people, and white evangelicals hate POC even if they have shared beliefs. They will tell their children to their faces they will only love them if they are the perfect Christians.

They think an Evangelical who commits rape or child molestation is still a better person than a nonbeliever who spends every minute of every day working for charity. Remember, nothing matters but accepting Jesus, so the former is fine, but the latter not only doesn't accept Jesus, but they're providing support to potentially the wrong people, which "deprives" them of the chance to be converted by an Evangelical who would capitalize on their suffering.

They know Trump isn't a Christian. They know he espouses exactly zero Christian values. They don't care because he is going to end abortion in this country and because his policies primarily make people they hate (IE non-Evangelicals) suffer. He's a flawed weapon they'll never stop using and adoring for that reason.

Similarly, they don't think climate change isn't real. They know it is. Rather, they want the Earth to become uninhabitable, and many people to die, to bring about the End Times. Then they get to go to heaven, and the rest of us sinners get to live on a ruined world as punishment for our "sins." Yes, they want to destroy the planet just so they can go to heaven in 10 years instead of 40. They are that staggeringly selfish. That's what a lifetime of being taught only Evangelical lives matter does to them. Again: they think life is nothing but a test of their worthiness to enter heaven. They don't take this life any more seriously than we took gym class. Leading to...

Every instance of human suffering, in their eyes, brings the End Times closer and is to be celebrated. Death, war, plague, etc, they think it means God is going to take them home really, really soon. They aren't interested in peace, because Jesus won't come in a time of peace. They want a worse world so they can "remind" God (who they think needs their help to do it) that it's time to start the Rapture. And this sounds weird, doesn't it? That if God is all-mighty, and even the Bible says no one will know beforehand when it's coming, why would they do this? Well, that leads to the last point...

They do not read the Bible carefully. They are told what the Bible means by their pastor, and that interpretation becomes law. That's why they believe in "the sin of empathy" despite Jesus saying to feed the poor and heal the sick- not only are they told they can't extend charity to non-Evangelicals lest they go to hell, but they are also told questioning their pastor is akin to rejecting the religion itself and thus they WILL go to hell for it. And in fact, interpretations of the Bible offered by others are seen as trickery by a false prophet, that they are being tested to ignore by God. You can't reason with them as another sect of Christian any more than you can as an outright atheist. They will not listen to you. They have been conditioned their whole life to see you as an evil agent of Satan who wants to deny them Heaven. You may as well put on a pair of horns and a devil tail and tell them to worship you.

Again: we tried to tell the public for years that these people weren't to be discounted, that their insanity and fringe beliefs made them MORE of a threat and not less, that it most definitely WASN'T reassuring that they were just "fringe lunatics" because they were working from the start to seize control of the government to turn the USA into a theocracy. Well, what happened? People stuck their heads in the sand and when they took them out, a newborn theocracy was there.

We can still mitigate some of the worst, but if people keep ignoring this and pretending they aren't going to do what they literally said they're going to do, a LOT of people are going to end up dead. Even more than the inevitable amount from climate change now that they've killed our last chance to stay below 2c of warming.

[baldurs-writers-3]

It's Gale Time!!!

Come explore the Wizard of Waterdeep~

For the Attention of by HardingHightown (2282, General) Content Notes: None Pairings: Gale/Mystra, Gale & Mystra

Gale writes two letters to Mystra, one before the game, and one just after defeating the Netherbrain.

Reccer says: An excellent character study of Gale, and a refreshingly nuanced take on his relationship with Mystra.

Learning Curve by AccursedSpatula (149742, Explicit) Content Notes: Depression, Suicidal Thoughts, Past Abuse (Verbal and Physical) Pairings: Gale/Rolan

Gale invites Rolan to assist with teaching at Blackstaff for a semester.

Reccer says: So incredibly well written with very strong emotional beats

Weave Me The Sunshine by ACrowsRockCollection (110026, Explicit) Content Notes: None Pairings: Gale/Jaheira

After joining forces in camp cooking duties, Jaheira and Gale's relationship transforms into something else. As they reckon with the Absolute, the stew pot, and their histories, Jaheira is forced to ask herself if she could find herself caring for a *Wizard*?

Reccer says: The one, the only, friends-to-lovers longfic celebrating our cranky High Harper and the wizard from Waterdeep.

A Heart As Cold As Ice by Defira (207094, Explicit) Content Notes: Graphic Depictions of Violence (canon-typical violence) Pairings: Gale/Tav

The story of a drow warlock, Ryme'dra Ulutar, trying to escape from centuries of being wielded as a weapon, and Gale Dekarios. The fic alternates between Rhyme's past and Gale's present (during the events of the game).

Reccer says: This story features incredible worldbuilding and character development intertwined with a powerful, heartwrenching, entertaining romance. Rhyme is such a nuanced and engaging character, and the author absolutely nails Gale's voice.

Four of Swords by positivejam (3676, Explicit) Content Notes: Creator Chose Not to Use Archive Warnings, Dubious Consent Pairings: Astarion/Gale, Gale/Shadowheart, Gale/Minthara

It’s Shadowheart that helps him dredge the Chionthar. It’s Minthara who pulls the crown from the deepwater muck. And it’s Astarion who places it upon his head. Another gift. No. A reward.

Reccer says: [pats fic] This one lives rent free in my head. Gale corruption arc! Subby, power-hungry Gale trying to rationalize bad choices! Ritual sex! It's really good, I promise.

A beast in the belly by librarypirate (730, Teen) Content Notes: Graphic Depictions of Violence Pairings:

Arcane hunger and intrusive thoughts, pragmatic and almost tempting.

Reccer says: Short and to the point, this depicts Gale's arcane hunger in a much more violent, primally evocative way than I tend to see in other works, and I've thought about it a lot since first reading this one.

Unintentional Surveillance by darkheartedrose (14821, Explicit) Content Notes: None Pairings: Gale/The Dark Urge

Gale hadn’t taken the tadpole into consideration when he’d started fantasizing earlier. Should have thought about the possibility that the parasite in his head may interpret his yearning in such a way that could cause it to resonate with Rhune’s.But he hadn’t. So now this was happening.

Reccer says: Quite literally sexting by tadpole, in the funniest (and smuttiest) use of that trope I've seen yet.

Both Sides Now by spacesunderstairs (5158, Explicit) Content Notes: Major Character Death Pairings: Gale/Minthara

Gale finds himself caught between two worlds and two names: the plain Gale Dekarios, or the wizard prodigy, Gale of Waterdeep. When he’s captured by a mysterious drow woman, he sees two futures: humility, or power– and the potential pleasures each path may provide.

Reccer says: A really excellent, compelling character study with plenty of spice and an extremely bittersweet ending.

To Life by vatisvera (2178, Teen) Content Notes: None Pairings: Gale & Jaheira

Wherein Jaheira tries to knock some sense into one of her newer “cubs”.

Reccer says: Beautifully poignant, well-written, made me cry (but in a good way!)

orphan hours by vertigo_cycle (4705, Teen) Content Notes: Gale-typical suicidal ideation Pairings: Gale & Astarion

Gale has a terrible time in the Shadowcursed Lands. Astarion attempts an intervention.

Reccer says: Really atmospheric, angsty, silly, and sweet all at once.

Suffer The Sting by ACrowsRockCollection (2001, Teen) Content Notes: N/A Pairings: Gale/Wyll

Bladesinger Gale spars with Wyll homoerotically.

Reccer says: THE TENSION. Extremely horny for a fic where nothing outright sexual is happening, with a dash of that signature Gale pining.

[cynthiav06]

The hot take of the pjo fandom that has been stated so often it's no longer a hot take. I have been avoiding making a post on this for a while, but now that it's been popping up in asks more, I needed to get my thoughts on it out. I know I have drawn it out long enough. Buckle up.

"Sally Jackson was a selfish mother." True. She is definitely a selfish mother. But I like the nuances that lead up to her behavior far more. And the way it shapes Percy, the subtle often overlooked cycle of abuse in the Jackson household that was present even without Gabe's influence. So, let's dive into that.

To begin at the beginning, Sally Jackson was an orphan with nothing but a small seaside cabin to her name at Montauk Beach when she met Poseidon. Imagine living like that for so many years with the gift of sight and no one to understand you. It's surprising she did not go at least a little crazy.

Her parents died when she was young, and she was taken in by her uncle Rich and "raised" by him. I say that in the loosest terms because she had to mostly do everything on her own and when Rich was diagnosed with cancer, Sally was the one who needed to drop everything and get out of high school to take care of Rich; not to mention the fact that she had to take up a job to pay for Rich's medical bills. Now if that sounds vaguely familiar, Percy used to take up jobs in his summertime to pay for Gabe's gambling addictions so that Gabe wouldn't beat him or Sally; to keep his mom safe. This was Sally's first failure. The fact that she could not protect her son from that same hardship despite having some power over the situation.

There's another facet to this that is whether Sally knew of this. Imagine Sally Jackson, doing everything she could to make ends meet, paying for Percy's schooling along with doing everything she could to not get on Gabe's bad side and keeping him happy, so he wouldn't turn his attention to Percy. Was her unawareness of the truth, her fault, or was Percy just that good at hiding it? Or should he have still known Gabe's true nature and looked out even more for Percy? Depends. But to Sally up until then, Percy had never lied to her; she is the only person Percy always tells the truth to from her pov. Sally could never fathom Percy keeping such a huge thing from her and not confiding in her. This is still tipping the scales against Sally because, in the end, it was HER responsibility.

Why no to Camp Half blood? This is the pivotal point. If you remember, Percy is unlike any other demigod. He is at that point, the only child of the elder gods to Sally's or even Poseidon's knowledge and, therefore, definitively the child of the prophecy. The way it was interpreted by Poseidon and then relayed to Sally, Percy had only 16 years of life set for him and no more. He was quite literally borne to die. Which meant Sally had a ticking clock hanging over her head in her time with Percy. To a mother nothing could have been more horrifying. So she defied Poseidon, defied the norm and kept Percy with her until she no longer could. Yes it was selfish, and even a touch idiotic but what mother wouldn't do it.

See this from Sally's lens. She had heard the Camp is a place for demigods. There's a chance she might not get to see Percy again when they find out about his parentage and not let him out of Camp. A chance, however, miniscule of them keeping Percy from her. At least the way she sees it, the Camp is full of virtual strangers with children of other gods who may or may not have it out for Percy. Even Poseidon had admitted he couldn't offer Percy too much protection lest he draw attention to Percy. Of course Sally who has had an awful life whose only highlight is her son, Percy, the only thing that motivates her to live and there's a death prophecy on his head, and no one not even a God can stop it . Why then would Sally leave her son in the hands of virtual strangers who she would never trust with her son's life especially when the alternative of keeping him close and watching over him herself is an option for her. After all, who could love Percy more than she loves him. Not even Poseidon, just Sally. To take all and every stolen moments she can, especially when fate is to leave her bereft of her greatest joy in mere 16 years? And the fact that she was so close. 12 years she made do. So close and yet nowhere near.

Who wouldn't make the choice she did? What mother wouldn't? But then again we will never know because no one else has gone through what Sally Jackson has gone through. Best we can do is speculate. I can only imagine how impossible the choice must have seemed. How inevitable it must have been in the end.

The crux of all this is not that Sally was right or that she wasn't selfish but the cost she paid for her selfishness.

Over 6 years of abuse, physical and mental humiliation under Gabe, all because she wanted to keep Percy with her. Keep in mind that Sally did everything she could to separate Percy and Gabe. Cue boarding schools. Sally suffered and chafed under Gabe's abuse alone, all for the sake of few stolen moments with Percy. To love something so much despite the alternative of dismissing the child considering Percy's fate was to die.

The uniqueness of the dynamics start when Percy, who despite his loathing for Gabe and the things he puts them through, despite the abuse he would face, resents Sally for sending him away to boarding school. The way he wants to stay with her, even with Gabe's presence as a caveat, because he loves Sally so much and doesn't want her to suffer and the dichotomy of Sally putting herself through most of the suffering so she could keep Percy by her side even if she had to keep him at arms length from home most of time so he wouldn't suffer is absolutely gut wrenching. No other way to put it.

The way she immediately makes sure to send him to Camp Half blood when things start getting absurd and dangerous for him; even taking the risk of driving him herself. Desperate to hold on to whatever last moments she might get with her only child that she loves so much, who she has no choice but to let go and then dying without hesitation for Percy's sake and with no regrets. Sally's love is selfish, but it is not conditional. Her love is selfish but so profound that she would put herself through any and all manner of miseries first to keep her son by her side. Nothing she would not do to keep him safe even if it costs her own life; anything but giving him up. Because she had nothing and no one to love her and then Percy came along and it was the greatest gift she had ever received and no pain on Earth would make Sally Jackson give up her son, ever.

The thing no one talks about is that even if Sally had made peace with sending Percy to Camp Half blood earlier, would Percy even go? Would he? Leaving his beloved mother with a monster like Gabe all alone? Percy Jackson's fatal flaw is loyalty and for all of Poseidon's infamous love for his own, Percy gets his fatal flaw from Sally Jackson; loyal to a fault, loyalty to the point of self destruction. To the end, always to the end.

Percy who would rather put himself through the cruelty of Gabe's abuse just to stay with Sally. Sally who would defy every norm and put herself through all manner of pain and suffering to keep her son by her side, to love him unconditionally even though he was borne to die. Sally dying for Percy without hesitation, Percy going to the Underworld to bring back his mother come what may without hesitation; Percy wanting to kill Gabe to keep Sally safe, Sally killing Gabe to secure her son's future. Something about the cycle of abuse in the Jackson household being an ouroborous, a snake eating its own tail. Mother and son sacrificing parts of themselves to keep each other safe, to stay by each other's side. The cycle of it being a conscious choice by both of them at least once. Not inherited, but accepted for what they ultimately desire. That's what gets me. Always.

Much has been said about Sally Jackson. Good bad, worse. But the idea that out of so many Big Three children, between Greeks and Romans and even the other pantheons. She is the only one who succeeded at keeping her child safe for so long and to be a good enough tether of warmth of family in his life despite all the hardships. Sally Jackson who loved her son enough to name him Perseus, to hope for a better ending for both of them despite the odds and the fates and even the gods all stacked against her and doing whatever she could to get there. In the end it does not matter, Percy is alive and that alone is proof that Sally Jackson has won against all odds. Everything else is a moot point.

[spinnileaf]

big hero rant. Pls read i need more hero appreciation💙💙💙

i think something a lot of people forget about heros character is that being praised for being "perfect" or "good at everything" and all things like that is. Not a good thing. everyone views it as good but the amount of praise and admiration he gets is extremely hurtful to him. whether its intentional or not the amount hes praised for things he does like good grades, college, cooking and cleaning etc. just sets huge expectations for him and makes him feel like its something he absolutely has to do or else everyone will be disappointed in him. hes almost never shown that kind of attention for his actual personality and how caring he is but rather what he accomplishes, and theres been so many points in his life where he isnt able to do those things because of his mental state (and cause nobody can live up to that much) no matter what he does, theres no way he'll always be able to meet everyones expectations for him so he will always feel like he is failing and not doing enough for everyone.He has so much that he wants to do in life and his own hobbies, but hes completely given up on them and everything that makes him happy just so that he doesnt disappoint his parents or other people who think too highly of him!! the amount people congratulate him for his achievements and everything hes capable of has given him extremely bad self esteem and a feeling that hell never be enough for everyone, but hes so closed off about it and will immediately mask his emotions because even showing negative emotions makes him feel like hes going to let everyone down and make them stop believing hes strong. Hes so focused on making sure everyone else is happy and nothing bad happens that he completely stops caring for himself and his own emotions, and that extreme kindness is what people should appreciate of him because its a trait that he has and will always live up to because its just how he is as a person and not something he could super easily not be able to do anymore. One of the only times in the game where hero is admired for who he is is when theyre sleeping at sunnys house and he describes hero as a person and why hell miss him ("HERO has always been someone you could rely on. He is wise, capable, loving, and always puts others above himself. He is the kind of person that will always make himself available to help you, even to a fault. You will really miss him.") all of heros friends truly do appreciate him for who he is, but he appears to repress his negative emotions towards himself so much that they assume he does as well and only feel a need to congratulate him for what he has done (it also really hurts to me that sunny doesnt talk/communicate enough to let hero know that hes one of the only ones who truly does see him and appreciate him for himself and want the best for him and what he wants uuuuu im really glad the game is told through sunnys perspective because he is so loving) when mari died, hero immediately fell into a deep state of depression and showed pretty much every sign of being suicidal, meaning he could no longer look after everyone and do things like cooking or his school work so he was extremely aware that everyones expectations for him were going to be ruined and that they wouldnt think hes doing everything right and well anymore. so im sure its understandable that after kel says "mari wouldnt want to see you like this", hero interprets it as "mari would be disappointed that youre like this too" and all of the hatred hes built up for himself and his lack of perfection comes out in the form of lashing out at him, but unfortunately for him showing that amount of anger just makes his situation even worse because it changes how kel views him permanently. even though kel is genuinely proud of hero and how hes gotten better and proud to be his brother, he will always be hurt by what happened and hero will have to live knowing hes permanently hurt someone who he loved the most because he felt like he wasnt good enough for them.

mari was also one of the only people who actually showed support in heros hobbies and dreams like cooking and things other people wouldve called silly, she was the only true support he was able to get and that made him appreciate himself more, so wehn mari died he didnt only lose her as a person and the whole friend group, he lost the only bit of belief he had left that he would be able to do what he enjoys in life and be free from everyone elses harsh expectations and enjoy the freedom that comes with being an adult

Anywau im really bad with words and theres like no thought behind this so its not meant to be a 'proper analysis' i just dont like how things like this are completely brushed over with him!! people always label hero as the "boring character" because they really do fall for the act he puts on to appear perfect and flawless to everyone else, either that or they just dont care enough to look into how complex his character is.And i want to bring attention to him so im pointing out for fun

[thehmn]

To the people who interpreted this as saying it’s a biological difference between men and women I hear you but the whole point of this post is that it isn’t biological but taught/learned. Otherwise I would have said cis men and trans women.

Most cis women, trans women and trans men got the talk at some point while cis men rarely do. Our dad allowed my brother to be out late but made me stay home so my brother had to learn on his own to be careful because he got into some pretty dangerous situations because he was taught not to be afraid even as a weak teenage boy. Now he’s more afraid to go out at night than I am. I broke my dad’s rules all the time but managed to stay out of trouble because I at least got the talk.

The author of The Gift of Fear also made an updated version of the book where he makes it more clear that he isn’t talking about biological differences but learned behaviors.

The post was brought on because I realized I’ve often been more afraid on vacations with cis men than anyone else. Not because I was afraid of them but because they’d drag me into dangerous situations completely oblivious to the danger or because they assumed they’d be able to fight off a gang of robbers or something.

That’s also why I said “weird men” and not just “men” in the woods. I hike a lot and often walk my dogs at 1 AM so I’m not the type to automatically be afraid of any man I see. So to be fair, it should probably be “choose the bear over a weird acting person” though I’d admittedly be slightly more worried about a weird acting man than a weird acting woman.

Listen, we need to teach cis men to be more afraid. It sounds bad but listen.

Every time a woman talks about being afraid when walking alone some guy or pickmegirl will eventually say “Actually, more men get murdered and kidnapped every day” and I can’t help but think “And yet you learn nothing from it?”

I love listening to people tell their survival stories and the genre is filled with men doing absolutely insane shit like getting into a stranger’s car late at night just because they offered them a ride, or going on a hike with a friend of a friend and getting blackout drunk with them in the middle of nowhere. No wonder more men get murdered even without counting stuff like gang shootings and war, and the stories always end with “I was young and stupid. I know better now”

The author of The Gift of Fear talks about this too. Women in general have a way better sense of danger and he used to get a lot of cases where, for example, something happens outside a couple’s car, the woman gets nervous and tells the man to stay in the car but he’s more curious than afraid, goes outside and gets killed.

Shit like this is the reason why men supposedly have shorter lifespans. It’s not because their biological clocks end sooner, it’s because so many die young while doing insane things, including ignoring safety at work or driving too fast.

And when it comes to being murdered it’s because so many of them think they can protect themselves just because they are men. But often times a lone criminal doesn’t care about your gender if they’re armed. How many times have we heard about women being attacked but is saved by another woman who happened to walk by. All most criminals care about in a situation like that is whether they’re outnumbered or have witnesses.

This is not me saying women are wrong to be afraid, or that all cis men act like this (my brother would never in a million years walk alone in the city after dark) just that cis men in general need to learn that they aren’t safe either just because they are men and their complete lack of fear isn’t doing them any good.

Because I’ve seen plenty of videos from hikers meeting either bears or weird men in the woods and I can tell you for a fact they’d choose the bear too.

[lilu787788]

Aleksander is, without a doubt, one of the most misunderstood characters in modern pop culture. And what’s worse, that misunderstanding often comes directly from the people who claim to support or “analyze” him. Too many limit themselves to surface-level narratives, repeating shallow takes without even attempting to engage with the complexity the show gives him. They don’t want to think about what it means to lead in a world built on fear, war, and survival. They want heroes and villains. They want moral simplicity. Aleksander offers none of that, so they either label him the villain or turn him into a fantasy object. Both of these approaches miss the reality of who he is.

Let’s be clear. He is not some romantic lead who got a little corrupted. Nor is he a power-obsessed monster. He is a man who had no choice but to lead, to survive, to make strategic decisions in a world that has always treated his people as disposable. Aleksander is not choosing between good and evil. He is choosing between bad and worse. And he knows it. That’s the difference. He is not naive. He is not driven by idealism. He acts with full awareness that every path he chooses comes with consequences, often including loss of life. That is leadership in a broken system. That is war. But instead of acknowledging that weight, fandom reduces him to a flat symbol.

This is the same fandom that cheers on so-called morally grey characters in other universes, or even in this one. And no, Crows are not morally grey. They are morally safe. But when it comes to Aleksander, that flexibility vanishes. Why? Because he doesn’t offer easy moral commentary. He doesn’t beg for forgiveness. He doesn’t give long dramatic speeches to justify himself. He expects people to think, to grasp context, and to understand what responsibility really looks like. And apparently, that’s too much effort for many.

Then there is the constant reduction of his story to his relationship with Alina. It happens repeatedly, even among fans who claim to care about him and wave the books around like they prove something. They treat him like a side character in her arc. They forget that Darklina exists because of him. But he is not defined by that ship. He has his own motivations, his own trauma, his own legacy. Stripping him of all that and reducing him to a romantic checkpoint is just as shallow as calling him a simple villain.

Worse are the tired, unserious arguments like “he’s thousands of years old” as if that somehow erases his pain, his goals, or his humanity. Yes, today one antis lady who read the books and understands them wrote to me that he is thousands of years old... The show never gives him a godlike or cosmic status. Yes, he is old. Yes, he carries history. But he is not immortal in the way people claim. What we see, thanks to Ben’s performance, is a man who has endured. A man whose age is written in exhaustion, not invincibility. He is tired, and that shows. But he keeps fighting. Even when children scream at him that they know better.

And then there is fanfiction, which more often than not turns him into a sexual caricature. An obsessive, manipulative seducer who thinks of nothing else. This version is just as far removed from canon as the villain stereotype. If you write him like that, you do not understand him. You are not building on the story. You are replacing it with a shallow imitation. And if you do that, you should not be preaching about who is or isn’t interpreting him correctly.

The truth is Aleksander represents difficult choices. He shows uncomfortable truths about power, survival, and control. People don’t like that, so they rewrite him into something easier to hate or easier to digest. But his story was never designed to make you feel good. It was meant to challenge you.

Ben gave us a version of Aleksander that is nuanced, vulnerable, and precise. A version that carries the weight of centuries and still chooses to fight. He is not perfect. He never claimed to be. He doesn’t have to be perfect to matter. He just needs to be understood in context. And if you’re not willing to do that work, maybe you shouldn’t be shaping the discourse around him at all?

[degenerata69]

I'm thinking on just how doomed the relationship between Sae-Byeok and Sang-Woo was.

Sang-Woo overhears that Sae-Byeok saw a hint of what the next game could be. From there, he spends the whole night and morning considering how he should approach her.

When he does, he finds out that she is similar to him: reserved and untrusting. So, he convinced her by stating how he grew up playing those games and if he could figure out what would be the next game be, she could follow behind and benefit from it.

They didn't have many interactions after, but they didn't need to exchange words for Sae-Byeok to know that trusting Sang-woo's intuition was the best thing she could do to get far.

She followed behind in both dalgona and the glass stepping stones, and likely joined Gi-Hun's group in part out of the familiarity Sang-Woo gave, knowing he would figure out the best outcome, and that benefited her indirectly.

She is still very untrusting, and Sang-Woo recognizes this. When they made the barricades to keep each other safe, he suggest how there would be two people doing the nightwatch to avoid betrayal. Ensuring a sense of safety for everyone, specially for her who was very vocal about it.

I wonder how big the argument between Sang-Woo and Gi-Hun was on her.

Unlike Gi-Hun, her morality was dubious. She was part of a gang, she knew how to use weapons, she probably saw blood on her hands in more than one occasion. Seeing Sang-Woo murder someone in front of her eyes wasn't something that would torment her, and she could interpret the nuance better than Gi-Hun, for sure.

But the words "we are only here because he could tell the tiles apart" [we are here because the help of others] must have made her reflect.

After all, it was thanks to them she has made it so far. They both protected her from Deok-su, they won a strength game against all odds because of their leadership and strategy, following behind Sang-Woo helped her survive two games. And they never asked her to return the favor.

She wasn't naive and knew that at that point, Sang-Woo was a threat to her, but she was already dying.

She wasn't interested in pursuing self-preservation as she did when entering the games, and she wasn't interested in "winning" (she would not make it), she just wanted her brother to be taken care of, as she could no longer provide that for him. And while she didn't knew neither Sang-Woo or Gi-Hun on a personal level, just by their interactions, she knew how deeply they cared for one another.

Her telling Gi-Hun to not kill him wasn't on her best interest, but she knew that Gi-Hun would regret murdering his friend, so she adviced against it, and she was right.

Seeing how her life faded away, the only way she could do to pay them back for all they did for her was to not fight anymore. Sang-Woo, disgracefully, accelerated her death, but I don't think she was tormented by it. She already let Gi-Hun know her only wish.

While Sang-Woo's actions were irrational, guided by the thought that after all the death and sacrifices they made, they would leave with nothing but the guilt in their hearts, he murdered her after seeing her moribund state. The loss of blood and her unresponsiveness must have made him conclude it was the "best" thing he could do for her (and he would benefit from it).

But we saw how shaken he was by the actions he wanted to believe were justified. How he regretted doing it immediately after, because, he too, wasn't that type of person.

**EDIT** just found this article and 😭.